People watching

"I don't know why I still feel like this. I used to do this every day when I was younger and felt fine the next day!"

"Our recovery rate from alcohol is getting slower."

"Shit, getting old."

-My colleagues post staff party where everyone was beyond recognisable thanks to the little bird who went around emptying bottles of vodka into everyone else's drinks.

"Kimberly! where is your drink?!"

"Here!"

*Picks up a random plastic cup with 1 shot of coke and 3/4 cups of vodka mixer that I have been pretending to sip from to prevent everyone from pouring more drinks for me*

*Sniffs and takes a sip from my cup.*

"What is this? Coke? No no no! This is not good enough!"

*Pours 3 glugs of vodka into my cup*

"Here!Much better!"

"....."

*Me

*Manager

A group of 15 year olds came in for a birthday party. One of the girls came in wearing the smallest and shortest pair of hot pants ever sans tights, thus displaying her spilling butt cheeks for the world of perverts to view. It is easily assumed that the person sewing the pair of hot pants in a factory abroad ran out of material for the pair of shorts but decided to make-do anyway. This girl possibly mistook the lack of denim for today's high waisted fashion trend. Anyway, upon seeing her other girlfriends, whom were all decorated with thick eyeliners and fake lashes, went into a squealing hugging spree. I swear to God observing teenage girls trying to act cool annoys me so much but I have to smack myself and remind myself that we were them once upon a time in high school: loud, annoying, and noisy, sans the lack of clothes, face paint of makeup and revealing butt cheeks. 

Anyway, one of my colleagues commented, "Aww, look at them going 'I love and miss you!' Just like us when we were younger." 

Another colleague stared in disbelief.

"When we were younger?!"

"Yeah, you know when we were their age. Clothes may be different, but attitude was the same, no?"

"When we were younger? Hell no. When I was younger my ass was tucked into my long pants!"

Another group of 13 year olds were just 2 table away having a separate birthday party. 

Another of my colleagues stopped by to whisper to me,

"I swear they don't look their age at all. They seem to wear so much cooler and prettier clothes these days. I mean, when I was 13 I was so much nerdier!"

 What was I wearing when I was 13? Oh yeah, matching shorts and T shirts. 

I didn't even know what the heck foundation was, and believed that pencil eyeliners were out there to stab us in the eyes. I was so young and innocent then. 

Shit, getting old.

I now conclude that the rate that girls are maturing these days, especially in a western country is actually incredibly scary. 

I see the bunch of teenage boys coming in with their immature attitudes despite their broken into voices, and they actually look more innocent and human compared to the girls who come in with their spider lashes and half naked dressing. If I were crazy enough I might actually hug the group of boys one day and make them all promise to stay the same for the next 7 years of their teenage life. 

Now I sound like the auntie who goes around tugging people's tops down and telling the boys to pull their sagging pants up.
Shit, getting old!